'So you finally deigned to arrive?' Ned's words are slightly slurred. He looks past you down the hallway, 'Oh and you managed to find Rick on the way. Hello, mate. That's quite a coincidence.'

'You're drunk and you're getting obnoxious, mate.'

'Getting drunk and is obnoxious, I think is the right way round,' Kate pushes past Ned and Polly follows her.

'Come on,' Polly grabs your arm, 'He's such a fucking pain when he drinks.'

You hear Rick and Ned start to argue as Polly takes you through to the kitchen.

Rick appears in the doorway and rolls his eyes, 'He's got it bad, Pol.'

She shrugs, 'He knows it ain't never gonna happen. And if he keeps up this shit, he'll drive me out of the house too.'

Kate leans over and whispers in you ear, 'Ned and your cousin didn't get on too well, not at the end anyway. Jess figured Ned kept pressuring Polly and they fought about it. Had a few screaming matches; not when Polly was there of course. Like she can't cope with him on her own.' Kate sneers, 'Ned's okay though. He's just a bit of a dickhead sometimes.'

You turn as Ned lurches through the doorway, knocking hard into a couple of people.

'Sorry, mate.' He heads over to you and leans over your shoulder, 'So how do you like us so far?' He looks around, 'Another vintage Si party!' He wanders away and a few minutes later you see him leaning over a girl, suddenly transforming himself into Mr Charming.

'Wow!,' you point and Kate and Polly laugh, 'You ain't see nothin' yet. He's amazing.

Until you get to know him, he can be the most charming, most flattering, most attractive man in the world.'

'That's why he gets away with so much.'

'That's why he's such an asshole, you mean.'

Rick watches and says quietly, 'He's my best friend and sometimes I really hate the guy.'

Ned glances over at them and his eyes narrow as he sees how close together Rick and Polly are. He turns back to the girl and says something which makes her laugh. She picks up her bag and they leave the room. Ned turns and winks as he goes through the door.

'Someone should put a leash on him,' Kate frowns.

'Maybe we could tattoo "Danger. Do not touch." on his forehead one night.'

'Okay. But you have to do it, cos' I'm scared of needles.'

Polly laughs and turns to you, 'So, are we having fun yet?'


© Philippa J Burne 1996

e-mail pburne@peg.apc.org